Dr. Laudi showed me my PET scans. I have active areas in my lumbar spine at L2 and L5 and a small spot on my icshium, which is the lower part of the hip/ pelvic bones. The plan is for me to take Xeloda (2 weeks on, 1 week off) for about 6 months, then rescan. Dr. Laudi thinks, once these active areas are taken care of, I may end up back on Tamoxifen. Xeloda has given me insomnia, so I am exhausted for the 2 weeks on and try to catch up on sleep during the 1 week off. It's a vicious cycle- always chasing sleep, but never quite catching it.
Mark and I have been working with a realtor and hope to find a new home for our family. Natalie and Larissa are busy with school, Girl Scouts, soccer and church activities. Olivia is sitting up now and playing with toys. Amore gets a surprised look on her face every time Olivia grabs her ears or pulls her tail trying to get it in her mouth.
After picking up the house today, I was straightening up Mark's desk. Mark claims to have a "system", but I wonder about that every time I vacumn under the sofa and suck up the receipts and envelopes he apparently has "filed" under there.
Buried in a pile of miscellaneous papers, I came across some pamphlets called "Care Notes." Given to people in times of need, they are meant to offer support. The tag line reads: "Take one- take heart. Give one- give hope." I leafed through them looking at the topics:
"Feeling overwhelmed when one loses feelings for another."
"When your spouse has cancer."
"Mother Teresa's response to suffering in and around us."
"We will meet again."
And, the one that made me giggle... "Beginning anew as a younger widowed person."
Hello? Last check, I am still here. Sometimes, I just have to laugh...